Seeing that I haven’t posted an entry in over a month, I guess I should extend my pleasantries to everyone by saying that I hope you all experienced a joyous and a happy Easter (Resurrection) weekend. I have always found the sites of America’s churches to be quite interesting on Easter Sunday. White dresses, decorative “church” hats, and kids tightly gripping their neon colored easter baskets seem to adorn the church walls like new decorative wallpaper. While, to some, this may be a pleasant site, the most interesting thing, to me, is the immediate surge of attendance that many churches experience on this day. In anticipation of the rise in attendance, some churches around the country have begun to hold their Easter services in professional sports arenas. And for the record, I am not one that looks down on this phenomenon, as I believe that it is a good thing that so many people choose to go to church, even if it is just for that day. Maybe they will hear something in that day that compels them to make more regular appearances. However, on this Easter Sunday, I was quickly reminded of my childhood and the similarities of my church-going experiences.
As a child, I grew up in the church. No, seriously. I really grew up in the church. On Monday, there was practice for the church drill (dance) team. Tuesday, we had a midweek church service. Thursday was choir rehearsal. Saturday, we often had other activities that may have involved the church. And finally on Sunday, there was Sunday School and regular church service. We then would eat dinner, many times at the church, only to return for an evening service. So, like I said…I grew up in the church. As a matter of fact, by the time I was in college, I thought that I was going to Heaven simply based on time served. Well with that background, you may be asking, “How is that similar to the sporadic attendance to those that seem to only attend on Easter Sunday?” Well, let me explain.
Although I spent the majority of my childhood living in the pews of St. Agnes Missionary Baptist Church, my reasons for doing so were similar to many others–obligation. In other words, I only attended church because that’s what I thought I was supposed to do. It sounded right. However, despite the amount of time that I spent in church, I still felt that my life was out of control. I still wondered why I failed to experience true happiness. I still struggled to overcome my internal battles and issues. But most of all, I continued to feel as if my life was undergoing an inexplicable and hopeless cycle. It was when I realized this that I made the decision that religion wasn’t doing it for me. Sure, I believed in God and that would continue. However, there had to be a way to experience the joy and happiness that I had heard so much about. Surely, there was an answer to all of the questions that haunted me on a daily basis. Well, there was…
In all of my questions, prayers, and conversations, I learned that there was a big difference between religion and relationship. Prior to that time, I had been attending church out of obligation, involving myself in the practices of the religion. However, the answers to all of my questions, the joy that I sought, and the break from that hopeless cycle was to be found in a solid relationship with God. So, here are the steps that I took to accomplish this:
1) Possess a desire to be in a relationship. The first step is to have a genuine desire to be in a relationship. If you are like me, the answers that I sought avoided me for so long that it began to make me miserable and lonely. This misery alone was enough for me to desire relationship.
2) You must have an experience. No relationship has ever existed without an experience. In this experience, you basically acknowledge the value that the relationship would have in your life and ASK for the relationship to be established. Yes, I said “Ask.” Let God know that you desire to be in relationship with Him.
3) Transparent communication. This occurs through prayer. However, when you pray, open your heart. You can’t hide from God, so stop trying.
4) Service. Every successful relationship involves service. In this, you develop the mind and heart to serve Him whom you are in relationship with. You understand what’s important to Him and begin to do those things because of the love that you now have.
5) Spend quality time. Continue to spend quality time through communication with Him.
These steps may sound a lot like many people’s list to obtain a successful physical relationship. That’s because it is. However, although we may know the steps to achieve successful physical relationships, we do not know how to implement them. An understanding on how to implement these steps come from establishing and understanding them through a spiritual relationship. So, for those of you that spent your Easter Sunday in church, that’s good. But I challenge you to move past the traditions of religion into a relationship. I promise, your life will begin to move to new levels.
Let me know your thoughts.
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